I have seen this trend since becoming a parent myself. Parents are not teaching character in the home anymore. They confuse manners with character qualities. "Please" and "thank you" does not constitute character-building. So many parents are worried about the academic nature of their children so early. Do they know their ABCs? Do they know their shapes? Their colors? Their numbers? A few words in Spanish? But it never crosses their mind to teach empathy, honesty, kindness, helpfulness, compassion, charity, selflessness, teamwork, respect, love, sincerity, trust, keeping your word, diligence, work ethic. Then, of course, parents are putting their children in as many activities as they can flooding their family schedules with "gotta be here this night" and "gotta be here this morning." Family time is out the window. Family dinner time is definitely out the window. And when you have these young children? Ludicrous. This time goes so fast. This lack of genuine family time, a substantial time to actually connect is hurting the very foundation that is going to make these little people GREAT people some day. And when they are older and involved in so many extra-curricular activities through school, have their own friends and social calendar and then start driving? Where is family time going to go then?
Then, not-to-mention the lack of spirituality in the home. Notice I did not say religion. Do families even pray together anymore? Pray for their country? Pray for their world they live in? Pray for the leaders of both? Pray for their teachers, their friends, their families? Isn't this a great way to teach your children to think outside of themselves? So many children today live in "child centered" homes where the marriage is on the back burner thus the ridiculous rise in divorce. These children are so used to the world revolving around them in every way that I only pity them as they get older. They will have no friends or no real relationships at least because they are too selfish. These are going to be hard-learned lessons for them. Lessons they will have to learn the hard way I suppose. But just a prayer a day with your children whether it be at dinner time or bedtime will allow them to think of other peoples' strife and tribulations in their lives instead of always looking into themselves.
If you want your children to have a profound place in the world they live in, a place where they feel it an obligation to give back to others and serve others, it has to start young and it has to start in the home.
And it has to start by having solid parental examples doing the same.
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One thing I have started doing that has worked wonders on my 4 and 2 year-olds is I purchased the coolest old, antique chalkboard. It just happens to look fabulous in my litte French-country kitchen. Anyway, I not only write my daughters' Bible memorization verse for the week on it, but a character word for the week. This week it is "helpfulness." We discuss the concept at dinner each night. When I see my girls serving each other or anyone else, I make a point to use that as example of their character word and praise them for it. I've even heard them thank each other for being so "helpful." These things must have a priority and a place in your daily family life. Figure out a way to make it a visible priority in your home. The dinner table is such a great time to pray, talk about a character word, visit about each other's day and just connect with your family. Not to mention it will make your evening so much more pleasant. These, people, are the times you will remember. And so will your kids.
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