I have this book that has changed my life. It is called, "The Truth About Beauty" by Kat James. I know I've mentioned it in a previous post before. I can not tell you passionately enough about why every woman in this country needs this book. Please make it your Summer read. I beg of you. Especially if you have daughters. Mine are going to read it and they are going to report back to me so that I know they've read it. It is that important to me that my girls know what real beauty is and where it comes from. And no, I'm not talking about "pretty is and pretty does" and "pretty on the inside too" and all that jazz. I am actually talking about the outside- hair, skin, nails, skin disorders, diet, water, chemicals, etc.
Kat discusses in her book a lot of what I talked about in my first skincare post but she just calls it "shedding." Shedding those mainstream beauty ideals that are crammed down our throats since the time were able to purchase our first Teen magazine. She lays out all the money that is spent not on the products themselves but on advertising and big-name celeb spokespeople. The products are crap. But we keep buying it. Please read this book. Please.
Since we are on the topic of daughters, I also wanted to challenge you moms to do something else. Instead of introducing make-up at an early age, why not start introducing proper skincare at an early age? I was fortunate enough to have a mother who instead of letting me wear make-up early, she bought me my first little tub of eye cream. She also had me drink water with lemon and cucumber and explained the benefits of this for my skin (and digestive system and liver....). Now this is a good time to admit that not only did I do a short stint of modeling, I was also a make-up artist for Bobbi Brown. I LOVE MAKE-UP. I love playing with it, owning it, buying it, putting it on my friends, doing their make-up for their weddings, etc. But for me, make-up is for fun. For going out at night. Make-up should be viewed as an accessory not a necessity. And that is the very mantra I will teach my girls. Once my husband told me that one of the reasons he fell in love with me in high school is because while all the other girls wouldn't have stepped foot out of the house without make-up on, I couldn't have cared less. But when it was time to get dressed-up, he said he was always in awe of how I looked. This meant a lot to me and shows me that smart guys, you know the "keepers," typically don't like girls with all that high maintenance fuss. I also had a guy in high school tell me I needed to start wearing more make-up to school specifically eye-liner. What the hell? This guy is now on his second marriage, has beer-bloat face, beer gut to match and is just a slob. His current wife (who I expect will not be his last) is a bleach blond, fake-tanning, Tammy Faye make-up wearing little thing. Someone my husband or any quality guy I know would EVER talk to or at least take in public. I think the difference in the two guys (the beer bloat guy and my husband) illustrates the two "camps" of wearing make-up. And this needs to be explained to our girls as well. Why do they feel like they need it? Are they trying to cover themselves up? Are they hiding from something? Are they trying to impress people? What is your daughter's root of interest in wearing make-up? If the answer is because "boys like it" or "all my friends are wearing this much" or "I'm just not pretty" we've got troubles! Teach them that "day" make-up should be nothing more than enhancing. Tinted moisturizer to even skin tone, concealer only for acne spots, cream blush on the apples of your cheeks, mascara and a tinted lip gloss (all with SPF in it if you can swing it). That's it. Now night for ME? Whole different ball game. But again, I see it as an accessory just like my clutch and heels! And P.S....I'm convinced I started the whole "smoky eye" craze!!! WINK.
Don't let mainstream media determine your daughter's idea of beauty or how to achieve it. It's just like talking to your kids about sex. If you don't do it, someone else will. And don't you want to control that information? Such important information? Start shedding your own beauty ideals and rituals and start feeding your hair, skin and nails from the inside out. Teach your girls to do the same. I so look forward to the days when I can have a blast with my two daughters doing the whole make-up gig. What fun! But they will never, ever be taught they can't leave the house without it or that they "need" it. And in the meantime, I'll just pray like crazy that they meet a guy like their Daddy and not "beer bloat" guy....